Wednesday, April 23, 2014

Nothing is a Feeling

To say I feel nothing, would be accurate if t'were possible. I was told to take time and reflect on what has been the last ~4 years of my life on an indescribable journey in publishing a novel (Unadequate). Perhaps they that have asked how I feel now that the book has been released expected too much of myself--who by my humble nature already feels so much. Given proper consideration, I suppose I will always see this otherwise prolific milestone as just another grain of sand in the hourglass, a notch in the belt, a clover in the field, an attraction in the road trip, etc...

Nothing, in theory, is tricky at best. And so I made a list in hopes that feeling would somehow follow intellect. This is what I've learned in this process:
  1. Do the work.
  2. In all things give praise and practice gratitude.
  3. Be wholly independent. You are not your inspiration/idea.
  4. Don't let your dream become your idol.
  5. Keep it close, and closer still. 
  6. Be ready to share with strangers, for strangers soon become your friends.
  7. Pushing? Stop.
  8. Not every problem requires a solution or fixing.
  9. Money can buy you time. 
  10. Invest your time in what brings you money.
  11. People will surprise you.
  12. Every setback is actually a setup for greater/better.
  13. Get your hopes up and build foundations to keep them there.
  14. Don't fight to quit - Fight to keep going.
  15. Details are everything and nothing.
  16. There are only "Good Days" 
  17. Give yourself milestones not plans or a calander.
  18. Trust the process.
  19. Never lose hope in the promise.
  20. Watch for miracles.
  21. Doubting yourself is fine, but never doubt He who works in you.
  22. Don't skip ahead, the forecast changes and you won't be dressed for the weather.
  23. Forgive yourself when necessary.
  24. You will never know the next step before you take it.
  25. "How Are You?" will reveal your true friends/family. If they don't ask that question in genuine concern,  don't be surprised if they disappear.
  26. Your physical, mental, and emotional state are connected. Neglect one and the others perish.
  27. Disappointment will happen if you're doing it 'right'.
  28. Do things that make you unconditionally happy.
  29. You will always know what you want. Ask yourself.
  30. Your definition of possible was meant to be rewritten.
I suppose that's the best of all the nothing I could offer any of you who are attempting to tackle the biggest of your dreams. For if you expect any fulfillment you must first be emptied; and when you have been emptied in pursuit of your calling... maybe nothing is the greatest feeling one can achieve. 

Nicole Lockhart

For those of you who've already read the book, thank you for your kind words and for sharing it with other readers. If you haven't yet read this little fiction gem of mine: Buy Paperback or Download Kindle.